Okay I really hate ABS-CBN right now, their onslaught of bad acting, bad directing, and over-all bad shows, make me puke red hot blood. What follows is my commentary to the only Lobo show I ever watched, seriously, I hate ABS-CBN.

The episode starts with Zoe, Noah’s sister, whom is having a tough as not-shaven-man-ass relationship with Lyka (A reference to the space dog, but all respect is lost since the Lyka character is stupid and very unoriginal, uninspired and a whole lotta “uns”), finds Lyka and her man-toy(AKA, buff extra with a failed relationship, and whose whole purpose is just for enticing more girls) naked, sweating, panting, and fondling(Well not really) after transforming from piss-ass “askals”(Phillipine version of flea-ridden mutt). The both were a “Lobo” who is a werewolf wannabee, just think of any werewolf without the kick-assery, and were just reverting to their wimpy human form, might as well call the show “Askal:we can’t afford proper effects to create an actual werewolf so you got stuck with trained dogs, and stupid ’special’ effects” damn right special, special child.

So basically, in good telenovela pattern, Noah follows Zoe, and sees the fuck-nut-of-the-scene. Zoe freaks the hell out, Noah flips out, Lyka jumped three meters up in the air, and died via being impaled with a steaming hot mettalic object I can only refer to as “freedom”, and the man-toy puts in a tight-fitting gimp costume and got a hard-on.

Fast forward to Noah house where Zoe is going like; “Holy shit, did I just saw some freedom justice over four frames ago?? Holy Fuck!” then Noah goes; “I gotta trust the love, the love and the peace, we must praise the eternal kingdom” and goes all non-manlike and over-all pussy. Then Lyka enters the scene with a hair just looks liked it swam the Great Atlantic Bedsheet, tries to explain to Noah Cheapo-Acto and his sister Zoe Wanna-Emo that she wasn’t screwing her love-slave, but she can’t tell the truth since Noah pretty much wants to murder every living Lobo, so what can Lyka say that matches her, naked, sweating, and with her “friend”, who is always by her side, kinda like an over-protective sex-hungry boyfriend or a bodyguard, now pick a reasonable scenario. After much fussing about Zoe then goes into a trance, not a hot trance like the one in 300(the prophet girl thingy, now that was HOT), she goes like a epiliptic trance that can only be described as between shitting an elephant, being blind, high, and then an epileptic attack. Noah then takes her to some undisclosed location, Lyka, meanwhile, fails to walk, or even act as the screen blackens, simple Lyka fails at any reaction and just looks like a poor, wet, napkin.

Then some regretably random stuff happens, some taling, crying, and some srious randomness. Then, afterwards, we look at Lyka, frocibly crying and looking like an ass. Lyka is trying to talk Noah out of beleiving his own sister that there wasn’t anything special while she and her lackey were alone, naked, and sweating profusely(god I think I’m over stressing the naked, sweat, and alone thing). Lyka turns on the waterworks(also known in the kingdom of shloo-vlok as ‘faky teary’) to maximum level, Noah tries to say something but is always interupted by Lyka saying; “No I won’t lose you NOOOAAAAHHH!!! NOAAAHH!!! I fucking blowed my brains out trying to scrap an relationship over you where I could find a very relaxing and much better one with my man-candy, but NOOO, I fucking squeezed love out of out utter shit of an situation(kudos for Lyka for forcing herself even though she is in breaking point, extreme non logic but hard woman-balls kudos)”. Noah slaps the hell out of Lyka, says that its okay, some happiness went on as mucus oozes from Lyka’s nose. Then he goes guns-blazing as he says “Will you marry me” WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF!!!! Where is the logic? Where is reality? Left behind in a puddle of goo. WTF! What happened here, he just saw Lyka seemingly trying to do her man-toy. What kind of desparate fuck this Noah character is? Is he really that lonely to try to secure their relationship with a wedding ring even after seeing her Lyka doing that guy(whose name I conveniently forgot so I just used words like “man-toy”),well at least in his perspective, and according to basic telenovela rules, or even real life, hell even physics says that that his perception is that Lyka was just getting boned hard, hence the sweat, even Zoe said so, and she is his fucking sister. A lot of stuff happens, Noah’s father, who is a Lobo killer of sorts, accepted Lyka with open arms, Zoe says “I love you, I’m sorry, I am an lesbian and since your mind-blowingly hot, I wan’t you to marry Noah so I can secretly lick you dry”, so now I get it, Noah whole family is a retarded mixing-bowl of creeps, or they officially support multiple partners, which isn’t half bad either.

Damn it, Noah’s whole family is a total freaking retarded bunch. Lyka is having the worst of days into the best of days into the worst again since she is marrying a Lobo killer, fuck her, and Zoe is still emo in my eyes and too over protective of Noah, can’t blame her though, still, incest is a bad bad thing, if your the one doing it, but a very very good thing if I am looking at it, INCEST ALL THE WAY, INCEST ALL THE WAY.

At least Lobo has some high quality babes.

~pR0n©